Goodbye...

...you ignorant, bloodthirsty piece of shit.

“Hello?...Tony? Pootie?....anybody there?”


Tags: goodbye, george w bush, goodbye george w bush, rat bastard, goodbye george w bush you rat bastard, smug, goodbye george w bush you smug rat bastard, half-witted, goodbye george w bush you smug half-witted rat bastard

“If There’s Success”

Preznit Shitferbrains, momentarily forgetting to say we’re kickin’ ass:

We all want to take troops out of Iraq and we are. He [Gordon Brown], by the way, left a lot of troops in, more so than they thought they were going to leave in initially, and so we communicate now and, if there's success, we're going to pull troops out and I have absolutely no problem how GB is managing the Iraqi effort.

Tags: george w bush, moron, douchebag, sociopath, iraq

Profit of God

I always wonder what Christians think when they read things like this:

Historian and defense industry expert Charles Patricoff believes that based on history our role in Iraq should be a permanent one. "Look at how we helped rebuild Germany and Japan after World War II. Because of the good we did there and are doing in Iraq, I don't believe we should ever leave Iraq. If we stay and rebuild Iraq, we will demonstrate to the world that we remain the best force for good in the world. More importantly, we as Christians can better influence that region for the Kingdom of God."

[. . .]

. . .Patricoff has worked in the defense industry for over 27 years. He currently works as a Sr. Contract Manager for Ball Aerospace & Technologies Corp, a major supplier for the military, NASA, and Homeland Security.

Now, I realize that critical thinking is antithetical to religious belief, so I don’t expect them to detect the false analogy or to question the unsubstantiated claims presented as fact in this first paragraph, but surely the information presented in the final paragraph makes clear to all the decidedly worldly motives behind Patricoff’s desire for perpetual “influence” in the region.


Tags: religion, iraq, charles patricoff

3305

From October 2006 through last month, 532 American soldiers were killed, the most during any six-month period of the war. March also marked the first time that the U.S. military suffered four straight months of 80 or more fatalities. April, with at least 58 service members killed through Monday, is on pace to be one of the deadliest months of the conflict for American forces.

[. . .]

On Monday, the military announced the deaths of seven more American troops - three soldiers in Baghdad and two Marines in Anbar province on Monday and two soldiers in Fallujah on Saturday. The deaths brought the total number of American military fatalities in Iraq to 3,305, according to icasualties.org.

link

Tags: iraq, iraq casualties, bush twins

No Atheists in Foxholes?

Apparently not:

"Privates lie beside officers. Soldiers beside Marines. Muslim troops beside Christians and those of other faiths."

I guess the Washington Post has never heard of the MAAF.

And check out this bullshit rhetorical question, taken from an otherwise straightforward article about atheists in the military:

"Would a soldier really die without faith?"

Sigh.

Tags: atheism, military

Tony Snow: Putting the ASS in Compassion

From yesterday’s press briefing:

Q Tony, American deaths in Iraq have reached 2,500. Is there any response or reaction from the President on that?

MR. SNOW: It's a number, and every time there's one of these 500 benchmarks people want something.

Yeah…they want their dead kids back, you insensitive piece of shit.

Have a nice weekend, everyone. I’ll be back in a week or so, blogging live from LA! In the meantime, fleshpresser’s got us covered.

Degradation: As American as Baseball Paintball and "A Few Bad Apples" Pie

A placard from Camp Nama in Iraq,
where some detainees were used as paintball targets.

June is Torture Awareness Month, and the Pentagon has chosen to mark the occasion by “omit[ting] from new detainee policies a key tenet of the Geneva Convention that explicitly bans ‘humiliating and degrading treatment.’”

Let that sink in: The Pentagon has decided that US armed forces—acting on behalf of me, and you, and our parents, and our children, and all of our friends and neighbors—can humiliate and degrade prisoners. Humiliate and degrade.

O beautiful for heroes proved
In liberating strife.
Who more than self their country loved
And mercy more than life!
America! America!
May God thy gold refine
Till all success be nobleness
And every gain divine!

Ah, The Simple Past!

According to Bush, “Coalition forces drove the Taliban from power, liberated Afghanistan, and brought freedom to 25 million people.” *

Use of the past tense makes all the difference in the world, doesn’t it? Of course, mainstream media outlets such as Radio Free Afghanistan and the Guardian love to thumb their noses at our president by refusing to use it in their liberal, anti-American, fact-based reports:

Lotfullah Mashal, a former spokesman for the Afghan Interior Ministry, says Taliban fighters no longer rely solely on hit-and-run tactics by small groups of guerrillas. Instead, the Taliban have been concentrating into groups of more than 100 fighters to carry out frontal assaults on government security posts. Mashal says that development explains why deaths in Afghanistan during the past week have topped the number of reported deaths in Iraq in the same period.

After four years and $12bn, £6.5bn, in foreign aid, the majority of Afghans still scrape through life without electricity or clean water. More than seven million people are chronically hungry, according to the UN, and 53% live on less than a dollar, or 54p, a day. The sight of foreigners earning large salaries and driving large vehicles protected by private security companies has focused frustrations.

No, no, no ! Repeat after me: Coalition forces drove the Taliban from power, liberated Afghanistan, and brought freedom to 25 million people!


*Read the entire transcript: Apparently, Bush is just like Harry Truman—minus all of that crazy “Fair Deal” bullshit, of course. Oh—and Truman actually fought in a war.

Support Our Troops

It’s actually a pretty simple thing to do. Mr. olio and I got into the care-package habit when olioboy was deployed, and now that he’s home it’s impossible to forget about the other kids still in harm's way—many on their second and third tours.

There are several non-profits to choose from—a fairly comprehensive list can be found here, or you can visit Any Soldier from the link in my sidebar.

Whichever organization you choose, please take the time to send our troops some coffee, a pair of socks, or even just a letter of encouragement. It’s easy to send stuff—the USPS offers a flat-rate box that only costs $8.10 to mail, no matter what it weighs.

Have a great rest of the weekend, everyone. See you tomorrow.

Does Anyone in the White House Read the Papers?

From today’s press briefing:

Q The Chicago Sun-Times has a story saying that many gang members are now in the army.

MR. McCLELLAN: Well, I haven't read the report that you're referring to. I think we have talked about the training and equipping of Iraqi security forces. There's been substantial progress made. And one of the areas they focused on was to make sure that you had a military that is committed to the country and not committed to any individual militia.

Sigh: Helen’s question was about gangs having infiltrated the US military. Obviously, McClellan thinks she’s talking about Iraqi soldiers—and he remains true to his talking points, although his answer is pure bullshit. Here’s a recent report from the WaPo concerning that “substantial progress”:

The graduation of nearly 1,000 new Iraqi army soldiers in restive Anbar province took a disorderly turn Sunday when dozens of the men declared that they would refuse to serve outside their home areas, according to U.S. and Iraqi military authorities.

[. . .]

Mohammad Abdulla Alawin, a recruit from Ramadi, said he wouldn't serve anywhere else; sectarian violence was one of his biggest worries. "We are afraid of the Shiite death squads which are found inside the Iraqi army, and who might kill us if we serve outside our province."

C’mon, Scotty! I know you’re a short-timer, but would it kill you to read a f*cking newspaper or two once in a while?

A Non-Partisan Plea

At least 33 US troops have been killed so far this month, a fact which the WaPo says “could signal a renewed insurgent offensive.” (Why do journalists always say the violence in Iraq is “renewed”? Has it ever ebbed?)

Now more than ever, our deployed men and women need to know we appreciate their service. Please click on the Any Soldier link in my sidebar and send our troops some coffee, a pair of socks, or even just a letter of encouragement. It’s easy to send stuff—the USPS offers a “flat rate box” that only costs $7.70 to mail, no matter what it weighs.

Thanks.

Please, Sirs, We Want Some More

Rice, Rumsfeld, Abizaid, and Pace appeared before the Senate Appropriations Committee today to ask for billions in additional war funding. According to Rice, Iraqi insurgents “would like to see that political process halted so that Iraq might devolve into chaos and conflict.”

Might?!? Might?!? Ms. Rice needs to spend less time in the gym and more time doing her fucking job. She can start with a refresher course on current events, and then I strongly suggest that she review modals.

“Rumsfeld told the panel he was disappointed that the House Appropriations Committee on Wednesday trimmed by $1 billion the Pentagon's request for $5.9 billion to continue training Iraqi and Afghan security forces.”

[. . .]

“Abizaid told the committee that the $5.9 billion is vital to successfully completing the development of Iraqi and Afghan police and military forces.”

Um, you guys? If you’re referring to these Iraqi police forces, you might have Rice on your faces.* (And what does “successfully completing the development of” mean, anyway?)

“Rice's opening statement to the committee was interrupted by a man in the audience who stood and shouted, ‘How many of you have children in this illegal and immoral war? The blood is on your hands and you cannot wash it away.’ As he was escorted from the room by security officers the man also shouted, ‘Fire Rumsfeld.’”

What he said.


* To have Rice on one’s face: To be left in an embarrassing or humiliating situation, especially as a result of being abjectly and willfully ignorant or in denial.

There They Go Again

From The Guardian:

“Polls suggest many Americans are now convinced Iran is the new public enemy No 1. Forty-seven percent told Zogby International they favoured military action to halt its nuclear activities.”

and

“Mr Bolton is expected to seek a 30-day UN deadline for Iran to back down or face counter-measures.”

Fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again…

Free Speech Impediment

At Wonkette, an “embedded operative” lists sites that are banned or approved by the Marines, while consortiumnews (citing Zogby) reports that “85 percent of the troops questioned believe they are fighting in Iraq ‘to retaliate for Saddam’s role in the 9-11 attacks.’”

Hmm…I wonder if there’s some sort of inference to be made here?

Can I Have My Money Back?

I thought our taxes paid for his medical care—why on earth would Bush need to own a Health Savings Account? I only wish our returning veterans had it so good…

All He is Saying is View Peace Askance

“For months, 17-year-old Andrew Saraf had been troubled by stories he was hearing about a Peace Studies course offered at his Bethesda high school. He wasn't enrolled in the class but had several friends and classmates who were. Last Saturday, he decided to act.”

Okay, let’s stop right there and take a little quiz, shall we?

Saraf registered his protest by

A) joining the Marines and proudly serving in Samarra.
B) enrolling in the course in order to better form an opinion.
C) attempting to have the course banned from the curriculum.

Hint: The answer is not A. It’s not B, either.

Sedition!!!

Wake up, America! Threats to our democracy are simply everywhere these days! The enemy has even infiltrated the VA!

Maybe we should detain and question the newspaper’s editor, too—I mean, if it’s seditious to write a letter like this, isn’t it doubly seditious to print it?

Honestly, if a nurse feels free to dissent in New Mexico, home of the GOP Loyalty Oath, we’ve obviously got a big problem! Let’s just hope KBR finishes those detention camps soon, so all of us decent Americans can adore our president and enjoy his perfect, not-open-to-criticism reign in peace!

Onward, Southern Baptist Soldiers!

Missionary positions:

“A statement of conscience calling the war ‘an unjust and immoral invasion and occupation of Iraq’ has been signed by 99 bishops and more than 5,000 members of the United Methodist Church, the second-largest Protestant denomination in the land.

“President Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney are both Methodists, but leaders of the 11-million-member church say they have had no response from the White House.”

[. . .]

“The largest single U.S. Protestant body, however, the 18-million-strong Southern Baptist Convention, says Bush has ‘shown courage and leadership in his valiant opposition to terrorism’ and deserves the ‘deepest gratitude and respect.’"

Hoo-yah, Southern Baptists! Heck, I’ll bet that y’all routinely invite military recruiters to visit after church services, so all the 18- to 39-year-old men and women in your congregations can sign up for active duty. No? Well, maybe you should think about it, because I’ll bet quite a few soldiers on their second and third year-long deployments would like to come home and give y’all a chance to valiantly oppose terrorism fer a spell.

Halliburton tells our troops:

You bathe in and make coffee with the water you have, not the water you might want or wish to have…

When life gives you lemons

As I noted in an earlier post, the US Army recently began accepting more applicants with low aptitude test scores. Well, today I read that the age limit for enlistment has been increased to 39, and now every time I close my eyes I see this:


On a more optimistic note, some folks in the know seem to think this is a swell idea. In fact, a local Army Recruiter in Guam actually said:

"This definitely is going to help in recruiting here because it's totally opened up a new market for us. Who knows, maybe we'll get some parents and kids enlisting at the same time."

See? If you look at it that way…