Onward, Southern Baptist Soldiers!

Missionary positions:

“A statement of conscience calling the war ‘an unjust and immoral invasion and occupation of Iraq’ has been signed by 99 bishops and more than 5,000 members of the United Methodist Church, the second-largest Protestant denomination in the land.

“President Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney are both Methodists, but leaders of the 11-million-member church say they have had no response from the White House.”

[. . .]

“The largest single U.S. Protestant body, however, the 18-million-strong Southern Baptist Convention, says Bush has ‘shown courage and leadership in his valiant opposition to terrorism’ and deserves the ‘deepest gratitude and respect.’"

Hoo-yah, Southern Baptists! Heck, I’ll bet that y’all routinely invite military recruiters to visit after church services, so all the 18- to 39-year-old men and women in your congregations can sign up for active duty. No? Well, maybe you should think about it, because I’ll bet quite a few soldiers on their second and third year-long deployments would like to come home and give y’all a chance to valiantly oppose terrorism fer a spell.